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Why telling people to change/repress/drop kintypes is psychologically harmful and abusive
- you are putting the theoretical momentary ‘offense’ of a group of people over the real, sustained feelings and mental health of a person who has to live with them day to day.
- you are telling someone to change a part of their core identity to be more socially appropriate
- a kintype is a discovered reason for feelings and memories that already existed in a person. By telling them to ignore that kintype, you are asking them to decontextualize potentially traumatic memories and experiences.
- you are telling them their emotional and psychological needs and health are unimportant to you.
- a kintype is not something someone choses. Telling someone to drop one is telling them to do something literally impossible.
- Telling a person to repress their kin memories is like telling them to repress childhood memories
- Ignoring a kintype won’t make it go away, it will only make the effect that kintype has on someone more confusing and upsetting. (effects like memories, supernumerary phantom limbs, feelings of loss and grief, etc)
Yes, this list is somewhat repetitive, but it’s important that people understand these points. Telling people to repress/drop/change kintypes is harmful, no matter what.
A lot of this will be ignored by the guilty parties, since they already believe that kintypes aren’t “real” and are more like the status symbols and aesthetic of tumblrkin. Naturally, when viewed from a perspective like that, they don’t understand how harmful this is. To them it’s like being asked to change the shoes you’re wearing, but in reality it’s like being asked to cut your legs off.
Oh yeah, it’ll definitely be ignored. But at least writing it out now gives me some copypasta to throw at them next time I see this behavior, instead of trying to respond in the heat of the moment. ^^
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