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Back when 99% of the otherkin discussion happened on forums, it used to be pretty widely understood and accepted that most people are not otherkin and that is okay. It also used to be acceptable for more experienced people within the community to tell less experienced people “based on what you said, you sound human to me.”
Before I go any farther, I want to make it clear that you are the only person who can know for sure whether or not you are otherkin. Unfortunately, I have seen that statement used to justify a lot of nonsense. No one can tell you that you didn’t have a past life as a wolf if you remember having a past life as a wolf. No one can tell you that you aren’t spiritually nonhuman. Similarly, no one can tell you that your brain is not producing a foreign, atypical experience that aligns you with something other than human beings. However, it is not gate-keeping for someone to tell you that the experiences you describe do not fit the definition of otherkinity or therianthropy. It is not identity policing to tell someone that the evidence they’ve supplied (ie: liking nature) is not enough for an open and shut “yep, you’re otherkin, for sure,” from the entire community.
One thing that constantly perplexes me is the way that people who do not identify as non-human get absolutely sick with rage when someone tells them they are probably not otherkin or therian. A lot of these posters seem to assume that by saying “you don’t sound otherkin to me” or “you don’t sound like you’re therian” or even “you sound other-hearted” or “you sound like you’re a really spiritual and perceptive human,” we’re basically saying “you’re not special; please go flush yourself down the toilet immediately.”
Some questioning posters actually describe experiences that sound very non-mundane (ie: spiritual, magical, etc.) but simply have nothing to do with being otherkin. You might be experiencing something like:
- Just knowing things without there being a mundane reason why you know them.
- Having psychic premonitions.
- Being able to read people’s minds.
- Successfully conversing with a deity or spirit.
- Seeing auras/energy/etc.
- Having prophetic dreams.
I have known some incredibly gifted psychics/seers who a lot of people consider special and valuable but who are 100% human. If you’re having experiences like these, you won’t necessarily find the support you’re looking for in the otherkin community where people are mostly talking about being otherkin. Instead, you might benefit from a community of intuitive people, psychics, clairvoyants, or other readers. Pigeon-holing yourself as otherkin and deciding that an otherkin identity is the only “cool” or “special” identity may cause you to miss out on what’s actually cool and special about yourself, which would be awful.
On the other hand, you might be having experiences like:
- Feeling a deep, spiritual connection to nature.
- Communicating with trees and plants.
- Feeling energized by certain natural elements (Earth, air, fire, or water).
- Having a generally “witchy” spirit.
Again, if these experiences don’t come with a sense of being non-human (spiritually or psychologically), then the otherkin community will probably not help you very much. You might do better talking to Pagans, Wiccans, and elemental magicians. A lot of awesome, empowering, unique things happen in those communities, so definitely don’t discount that possibility if it’s calling to you.
As far as “specialness” goes, there are a lot of ways that humans can be spiritually or psychologically unique. You do not need a kin type for that. If you don’t believe me, consider this:
With hundreds of thousands of years of human history, there are countless magical and mundane events you could have lived through, many of which are positively fascinating. There are also a lot of awesome human experiences you may have had before even if you have not had them yet in this life. This doesn’t mean “pick an era/historical figure and say it’s your past life.” It means that if you turn out not to be otherkin, it doesn’t mean that nothing cool has ever happened in your spiritual history or that your past lives are “boring” or “predictable” by default.
Some people with human past lives believe they’ve lived in a parallel world before or even incarnated in a non-linear fashion from the future. That can be pretty interesting.
Most gifted psychics (not the fake scam artists) are human.
Most powerful occultists (again, not the fake scam artists) are human.
There are many people who are not neurotypical or who have unusual and interesting neurochemistry but who do not identify as non-human. There are many more possibilities than just neurotypical or otherkin.
My point is, being otherkin means identifying as non-human. If everyone who really, really liked animals was therian, most second-graders would be therians as would most zoologists, animal liberation activists, vegans in general, and so forth. If everyone who felt personally inspired, encouraged, or uplifted by a specific TV show or other canon was fiction-kin, then every literate person would likely be fiction-kin of a book character and everyone with a TV would be fiction-kin of someone from TV. If everyone who empathized with fictional characters was kin then everyone who cried during Jessie’s song in Toy Story 2 or during that volcano love song before Inside Out would be fiction-kin. If everyone who always liked imagining themselves as mythical creatures was otherkin then there would be more vampires and werewolves out there than you can even imagine. There has to be a difference between liking things and being things. Otherwise, what would be the point of saying you were otherkin or fiction-kin or therian?
Posts like this one often get hit with “but it’s not hurting anyone, so why do you care?” type responses. There are a few reasons why I care about preserving the definition of “otherkin.”
When literally anything and anyone can be considered otherkin, fiction-kin, or therian, there stops being a reason to even have those words. The words exist to help people with unique experiences explain those experiences, and if non-unique experiences (liking animals, for example) are lumped into those categories, it becomes more confusing and challenging to explain the experience of being non-human.
I also think that people who are dead set on the idea of being otherkin despite not really identifying as non-humans often end up in a cognitive loop where they have to avoid things that challenge their identities (which is hard when your identity is not based on you being honest with yourself). It’s one thing if you need someone to be sensitive to a real identity because it’s your truth and another if you need someone to “play along” so to speak in order to keep you from having to deal with whatever the kin type is covering up (ie: not feeling special). Moreover, I think it can keep people from exploring what’s actually special about them and sometimes can hold people back if they get stuck thinking “this is the only way to be special.”
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